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Cristobal’s Ducks Underperformed?

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Excellent discussion about the Ducks. Interesting how Cristobal’s Ducks consistently underperformed relative to their recruiting level. Behind paywall but I must have a few free views left. 
 

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THEATHLETIC.COM

The Ducks didn’t reach their potential last season, and it's Lanning’s job now to keep the talent flowing in and to focus on...

  

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We cannot see it--please summarize for us?

Mr. FishDuck

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Yes. 

 

They were let down by a rigid offensive scheme that made everyone worse. 

 

The running backs were running downhill into linemen... The offensive line had to block some incredibly obvious gaps which resulted in the defense loading the box. This resulted in minimal gains and both runningback and offensive linemen looking bad.

 

And then the defense ... I don't know why it underperformed as bad as it did early in the 2021 season when the team was at it's healthiest. Too many underneath routes were left open which allowed for easy outs for the quarterback and didn't allow for the pass rush to get home.

 

And I didn't even get started on a lack of good receivers for 2018-2019 for Herbert and then the growth of a receiver corp that did t have a QB to pass to them. 

 

Ughhh... 

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It's so funny... i see how he's recruiting down at Miami, already got some talented players on the team and a top notch qb and find myself thinking... well if he just hands things over to his OC and DC they could do really well... wait... 🤔 I think I've said that before... 

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Underperformed 3 outa 4. Didn't really need a study to tell us that. Some of the most uninspiring football I have ever watched.

 

Last year injury bug hit Oregon hard. A ton of kids played. Should be to Oregons advantage the next couple years. 

 

If Lanning is half as good at game day coaching as he is at recruiting and hiring staff... good days ahead my friends.

 

Super excited to see how the next few weeks play out. Practice starts next month. 

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Charles asked me to summarize the article so I’ll give it a shot. The article looks at the strength of Oregons offense, defense, and special teams. It also discusses the impact of Dan Lanning, overall saying it’s positive since Lanning and Cristobal have the same "bring the best of the SEC to Oregon" approach.
 

The article also discussed how the team, in certain areas did not perform up to its talent, summarized by the graph I attached. Overall the writer  says that if Oregon plays to its level of talent, Oregon should be competing for the PAC-?? championship (unlike last year).

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Prevent offense will do that to a team...

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Wash, rinse, repeat for MariØ.  Knowing good ol predictable, Micromanaging MariØ, he is setting Miami up for disappointment.  His ability to recruit elite talent has never been in question.  It's what he fails to do with the talent that will put his team in a position to lose, that will drive Miami fans up the wall and have them second-guessing him and his effectiveness as a coach.

 

And to think Miami is pushing to join the SEC, when MariØ struck out in his attempts to get the Ducks to playoffs.  He couldn't capitalize and dominate in a weak conference, with essentially a bunch of 4 and 5 star players, playing against mainly 3 star teams and a bewildered SC team.  If you thought MariØ was out of his depth in the Pac 12, imagine how he's going to look competing in the SEC, full of sharks.

 

Lanning and staff are going to show MariØ, how he squandered the wealth of talent on this team and got the Ducks to underperform each season.  When Lanning was coaching at Georgia, he was trying to recruit Noah Sewell and Flowe and spoke highly about both of them.  Ever since Lanning took over the Ducks as HC, he has been chomping at the bit to coach and work with these guys.  I bet he has plays already drawn up to utilize and maximize their full skill sets.

 

I'd like to see Lanning and staff coach up Dontae Manning.  He has yet to flash 5 star potential as a Duck.

Edited by DuckIt
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Excellent article. It is rather long, but gives good detail about each part of the upcoming Duck offense and defense.

 

It sure makes you see how our past coach didn't coach players or games to potential. Sad to see that potential wasted.

 

So happy Lanning is here and best of all, the team appears more cohesive.  GO DUCKS!!!!!!

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What if the Miami gig was his target all along?  He inherits a team that underperformed under Taggart and a good QB coming back.  So, he plays it safe to not blow his shot at the U.  Probably was talking to that donor all along, too.

 

Solid QB, weak conference, USC down......all he has to do is not choke to win 10 games per year, and wait for Manny Diaz to chooch the pooch. COVID gave him an excuse for one year but exposed the weakness of his strategy when he doesn't have an all-star qb to save his behind.

 

The question is begged:  if he did pull the rope-a-dope strategy with us, how will things be different in Miami.  Let his coordinator's coach and scheme?  If so, maybe he will excel.  Or, is he really a stubborn blockhead who knows how to recruit but can't run a program?

 

His lack of game management would push me to the blockhead theory.

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     There’s not much you can do when reality catches up to a coach who is unwilling to adjust to it. MC’s team produced during the Rose Bowl season, but the following year when opposing defensive coordinators played catch-up and studied his blue print, he never adjusted to their adjustments, and he lost his team’s faith in his vision.

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Guest Axel

Not only did Mariø Cristøbal’s Ducks underperform--so did Mariø’s Golden Panthers at Florida International University. After just 10 and a half seasons of coaching, if you’ve got the number 60 hanging there in the loss column like a maggot-riddled wildebeest rotting in the sun, there’s been some world-class underperforming going on.

 

And please don’t lecture us about making losses sound so disgusting. If losses weren’t so malodorous and revolting, the entire starting lineup of the ’62 Mets would be in the Hall of Fame, Mark Helfrich would still be coaching Our Beloved Ducks, and the vast majority of us would be gulping Xanax by the fistful.

 

But back to Mariø Cristøbal. With a head-coaching record of 60 losses and only 62 wins, you would think he would have a gnarly time getting a gig with even the worst schools--a Harvey Mudd College, a College of the Ozarks, or a Sewanee: The University of the South. Yes, these are real institutions—I tried to create humorous sounding ones—but why bother, when you’ve got these goofball names?

 

I’m trying to picture a mom bragging to one of her nettlesome neighbors, “Oh, we’re so proud of Dylan—he’s been accepted into Harvey Mudd.” I can picture the nettlesome neighbor laughing in the mom’s face.

 

But again, back to Mariø Cristøbal. He not only managed to escape scrutiny for those 60 maggoty defeats, he also elevated his coaching standing, despite two losses against Utah last year that carried all the abominable stench of maggot cheese, that Sicilian formaggio made with rotting pecorino and live housefly larvae.

 

Yes, we intend to make you retch, because it’s the only way you’ll understand the same revulsion we felt watching those two vomit-inducing games against the Utes—horrendously humiliating defeats, the nauseating product of Mariø Cristøbal’s inept coaching. The even-more-inept simpletons who have a say-so of the University of Miami’s purse strings foolishly rewarded Mariø with a $80 million contract over 10 years.

 

If Mariø’s contract was based on fair pay for fair work, the average schoolteacher in America would be hauling in $17.5 million a year, and the guy flipping burgers at your neighborhood Carl’s Jr. would be bringing in a cool $10 million.

 

Put another way, if justice were a real thing in America, Mariø Cristøbal would currently be marking time at Florida State Prison, doing 20 to 40 for strong-armed robbery and fraud. Instead, there he was at the podium in Coral Gables last December 6, doing what he does best—blathering.

”Wow, this is beyond what words can describe,” Mariø blathered, pathetically ecstatic in casting off the Ducks. “This is strong,” Mariø blathered some more. “This hits as hard as it can hit.”

 

Mariø Cristøbal was blathering from experience there. Three days earlier, Mariø’s Oregon Ducks had gotten hit as hard as they can be hit, 38 to 10, by Utah in the Pac-12 championship game.

 

After that game, Mariø was asked if he would “sign a contract extension at Oregon” or “accept the Miami job they’ve offered.” It turns out that in addition to blathering, there is something else that Mariø Cristøbal is good at and that is lying.

 

“When you say someone’s offered, I haven’t talked to anybody,” Mariø lied, with a snarl. “So let’s not create narratives, okay?” he lied again, exhibiting all the grace of a jackal with a toothache. Two good lies deserve another, so a few moments later, Mariø lobbed this whopper: “I would say if there’s anything to report, I would report it.”

 

Flash forward less than 72 hours, and Mariø was at that podium in south Florida, continuing to blather: “As we talk about taking things and elevating the standard to elite levels, it all starts with work.”

 

Work? Was this more blather or was it also a lie? Obviously, Mariø did very little work preparing for those two putrid, pitiful games against Utah. He was about as competent and useful as Rip Van Winkle when he was snoozing under a tree for 20 years. When Mariø Cristøbal waxes eloquently about work, we think you’ll agree that this represents a third thing that he is good at: B.S.

 

Rachael Ray or Bobby Flay couldn’t concoct a more perfect recipe for a recruiter: blather, lies, and B.S. Mariø could hit the recruiting trail wearing a chef’s hat and it would be totally appropriate.

 

But use those same ingredients for actual coaching—communicating with staff and players, preparing a game plan, making in-game adjustments—and you have the ideal recipe for underperforming. It’s a sloppy recipe that will give you 60 foul-smelling losses in a decade and unforgivable losses in must-win games that will make your players, fans, and alumni violently ill.

 

We point all of this out for our dear Hurricane friends in Coral Gables. We say “dear Hurricane friends,” because they took maladroit Mariø off our hands, and for that we are grateful for many future days--until the day that the U.S. Postal Service becomes competent or until the day that the moon wobbles out of its orbit and plops in the Pacific Ocean, whichever day happens later.

 

And so Canes friends, you will get recruits who buy Mariø’s blather, lies, and B.S. You may also enjoy some of Mariø’s blather, lies, and B.S. yourself. But then the games will start. And Mariø’s blather, lies, and B.S. won’t sound so good in his postgame press conferences, when he is bemoaning poor scheming and poor execution and giving credit to the other team for winning.

 

Get used to hearing Mariø blather, “Credit to them.” That doesn’t mean you, or your alumni, or your Canes players. “THEM” means your opponents, and Miami losses will pile up and up, until what you have is a rotten, stinking mess.

 

Take heart, Canes fans. All is not lost. Just get a doctor, one with a thick prescription pad, and be sure to choose a pharmacy with a huge inventory and lots and lots of Xanax.

 

It will make it easier on you when you come to the icky realization that the U that Mario blathers on and on about stands for “Underperforming.”

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Blasphemy about Harvey Mudd?  US News ranks them at #28 among liberal arts colleges so maybe mom has a right to be proud.😀  In addition they also have a sense of humor..."Harvey Mudd is one of the country’s top math, science and engineering undergraduate colleges. The school offers a variety of student organizations on campus, from the break-dancing club to the Harvey Wallbangers Climbing Club, among others."

 

 

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On 7/11/2022 at 9:45 AM, Axel said:

 

 the abominable stench of maggot cheese, that Sicilian formaggio made with rotting pecorino and live housefly larvae.

 

 

I happen to be one of those lucky 5 guys in 1964 who won the world's first and only SmelloVision TVs. SVTV Corp...look it up...went out of business for some reason (??) before they had a chance to officially launch this amazing product.  I have kept mine in working order all these many years.  It was responsible for losing one marriage and winning another (fractured septum).  Anyway Axel, you must have been one of the other 5 people to win one of these SVTVs back in '64.  Because...you exactly nailed the stench coming from both of the Utah games.  (Although...I noted just a tiny hint of Mojave-aged tuna.) 

Good job, brother.

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Would we all feel better if the cumulative score between UU & UO wasn’t 76-17?

 

Injuries considered; I don’t think the Ducks fielded a team loaded with talent.  Our primary offensive weapon at RB was a 3* player, and we saw what the NFL thought of OBD’s players during draft time – Diddly-squat, poo.  So, what did we expect?  We played for the conference championship and got beat by a highly inspired, very good football team.

 

Also, we received a little fools gold in tOSU game courtesy of DC, Kerry Combs.  Dude was demoted after the Ducks game due to giving-up 200+ yards rushing in consecutive games while not even flinching to make any defensive adjustments.  Following the first two games, tOSU didn’t give up numbers close to those until they went to Meeshigan to play Captain Khaki and the 3-Yards in a Cloud of Dust Roughriders Nov. 27th  (granted, CK’s bunch did run wild). 

 

As far as MC lying about his intended moves during the end of his tenure, what was he supposed to say? 

 

“Hey Mario, any truth to the rumor you’re headed to Coral Gables?”

 

“Absolutely.  Why wouldn’t I.  My compensation will be delivered by Brinks, it’s my alma mater, it gets me closer to my ailing mother, and quite frankly...it’s my dream job.” 

 

Of course, he’s not going to say this.  He’s going to stand behind an exceptionally decorated podium, deny and deflect as best he can, and short-answer his way through an uncomfortable press-conference.  Now, his internal monologue will be in over-drive, and he’ll probably be envisioning maiming the unsuspecting questioner, but he’ll suck it up and flash that 80-million-dollar grin.  Not so different from many others who have been in a similar position.

 

BTW, I think tU will fair quite well in the current ACC.  Isn’t part of the reason Clemson shines so bright due to the conference’s supporting cast being so incredibly dim?  Did you guys watch Uiagalelei last year?  More Pics. than TD’s while completing 55% of his passes.  Thought it was even uglier than the numbers reflect.   

  

Miami’s QB situation is much better, and I believe MC will dial back the passing governor just a bit.  Yes, I’m taking for granted that even MC can garner an improved football acumen.     

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Guest Axel
On 7/11/2022 at 11:33 AM, McDuck said:

Blasphemy about Harvey Mudd?

I graduated from the University of Oregon with an M.S. in journalism and a B.S. in blasphemy.

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Guest Axel

My quarrel with Mariø about that post-Pac-12-championship-game press conference wasn’t just about his words—it was with his “how dare you ask me these questions” arrogance.

 

The Oregon media is soft, and Mariø, the “physicality” expert knew this, so he felt no compunction in acting like a jerk at that presser and out-and-out lying to all of us. Mariø could play the bully and get away with it, so he did.

 

What should Mariø have said?

 

When that press conference was going on, the gig with Miami was all but sewn up. He would accept the job with the Hurricanes less than two days later. He certainly didn’t have to prevaricate and mislead everyone.

 

A savvy coach would have anticipated the questions about the Miami deal and he would have been prepared. Of course, those Utah games alone showed us that Mariø Cristøbal is poor at preparation.

 

An upstanding guy would have said, “It is true that I’m talking to both Oregon and Miami about my career path. For now, I’ll leave it at that, and I will update you before the weekend is out.”

 

This would have hardly been shocking news. The media in Miami had already broken the story. There was no reason for Mariø’s snarky treatment of the media at that presser.

 

Mariø, for some strange reason, even threw shade on the media that night for ferreting out the truth, when he said, “How the media treats it, how the media postures it, I have no control over it.”

 

In the end, this was vintage Mariø—a press conference filled with Mariø blather, lies, and B.S.

 

After last year’s Stanford game, I was hoping that the Ducks would fire Mariø, but I knew that the chances for that happening were minuscule. I am grateful that last year’s cards fell as they did and that the dopey people in Miami saw something in Mariø that isn’t there and lured him far, far away.

 

For the first time, Mariø ball will be fun ball, not torture ball, for Ducks fans. As for Mariø Cristøbal, odds are good that he will discover, as in the words of the famous Thomas Wolfe novel, “You Can’t Go Home Again.”

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On 7/11/2022 at 1:50 PM, Axel said:

I graduated from the University of Oregon with an M.S. in journalism and a B.S. in blasphemy.

I looked up Harvey Mudd College -its in California -fairly impressive college for 800 students. 

 

I wonder if there's an Elmer Fudd U?

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Axel wit some roll, very nice.  Some great comments and fun reading here lately from you, thank you sir for lightening the mood with your recent contributions.  I have enjoyed them, immensely.  You seem to be an OBD minion of sorts, I like.

 

despicable me minions GIF  You represent the O well!  Do not let ANYONE, tell you different!

 

 

 

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We can all agree on one thing--MC was to BS as BS is to BS

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