Beavers Not Going to College World Series--Pac-12 Tourney is to Blame

[Guest Axel]

Yes, we pick on the Beavers a lot. We toy with them on the football field. We know, and so do they, that they aren’t going to the Rose Bowl for at least another 50 years. The odds of Beavis making it to the College Football Playoff are roughly equivalent to the chance that Coach Lanning is going to call this afternoon and offer me this year’s starting quarterback job. (But wait! I can throw a tight spiral, and, and…oh, forget it.)

 

We laughed at the Beavers’ disaster of a basketball season. We make fun of their Halloween colors, their pitiful football crowds, their hideous mascot, and their insipidly designed logo. We call them rodents and rats and nasty critters of every kind. That’s what big brothers do to little brothers--you know, keep them in their appointed place--last among equals.

 

But when little brother gets pushed around unfairly by a dimwitted bully, that’s when we rise up and flex our muscles to stand up for little brother. We realize that the Beavers can’t talk for themselves, because a rodent doesn’t speak, it squeaks.

 

The numskull bully that wronged the Beavers is the Pac-12 conference, more to the point, the dimwitted morons who cooked up that cockamamie Pac-12 baseball tournament, the completely kooky competition that I complained upon its completion, “Nobody won and everybody lost.”

 

I’m much too humble and modest to point out that I was right about that, but I was right about that.

 

You can make the argument that Stanford is the Pac-12’s big baseball winner. But I submit that Stanford is a nobody outlier, an eggheaded amalgamation of tree-huggers, whale-lovers, and quantum mechanists, none of whom could tell you the difference between a punt and a bunt. Stanford undergrads have their heads too far up in the clouds to notice anything as pedestrian as a “ball game.”

 

Besides, Stanford can never be seriously classified as a winning school. They forfeited that right 40 years ago, when one of their trombone players was wandering aimlessly in the end zone while a game was in progress. We all know what happened to him for that transgression—ouch!--but the bigger lesson is that “The Play” only proves that even Stanford football players don’t take the game seriously.

 

But back to our little brothers and that idiotic Pac-12 baseball tourney. The Beavers played 30 regular-season conference games and won 20 of them. All that tournament did was give the Beavers a chance to further overwork and grind down their players, especially the pitchers. In four tourney games, Beavers hurlers were unceremoniously tattooed for an average of 10 runs per game.

 

The game where UCLA bombarded our little brothers with 25 runs effectively ruined the Beavers season. The late, great philosopher Yogi Berra once observed, “Baseball is 90 percent mental, the other half is physical.” That 25-run blitz shattered the psyche of the Beavers, and they never recovered.

 

We can thank those lamebrains inside the Pac-12 for the Diamond Ducks early demise, too. If not for that useless, asinine tournament, the Ducks would have hosted an NCAA regional. Our Beloved Ducks might still be playing—we might have made it through to Omaha. (No, I really don’t think we would have made it THAT far with our crummy pitching, but humor me a bit, okay?)

 

Big brother, little brother, the whole damn conference, all losers on the diamond, because of the half-baked, half-witted, fully crackheaded Pac-12 baseball tournament. Smart people would cancel next year’s tournament today, now, this minute, this second, you get the general idea. But smart people are doing more productive things, like figuring out which Powerball numbers are going to hit, and then retiring to the French Riviera.

 

So Beavers, we feel your pain. You’re our favorite little brother. And we can’t wait to pick on you some more this November at your house.

[Dukduponquak]

Why hold back, say what’s on yer mind!! I agree entirely however!

[Charles Fischer]

On 6/14/2022 at 11:27 AM, Axel said:

I’m much too humble and modest to point out that I was right about that, but I was right about that.

Too many great lines in that post....humor toward the Beavers at its highest...to select the best.  But not only was that funny--it was very true.  Why burn our pitchers out ahead of the NCAAs?

[DazeNconfused]

I disagree. 

 

OSU lost series to Tree early in the year at HOME.

OSU closed the Pac 12 regular season losing the last two series at Zona and home to UCLA, dropping 4 straight during the two weekends.

 

ACC, B1G, Big 12, SEC, all played a conference Tourney. 

 

OSU came into the season really strong but lots of other teams seemed to improve as the year went, OSU not so much. 

OSU went 9-9 from the Zona series two weeks from the end of the regular season until getting beat yesterday. 

 

OSU made key errors in the post season and left runner stranded yesterday. Watching them I just don't feel they were that darn good, or there is just lots of parity in college baseball right now. 

 

9-9 down the stretch seems to make you an overrated #3 national seed.

 

I think if you asked OSU players, they would say not making Omaha is on them, Forrester had one hit this weekend, Bazzanna left guys on base ever at bat yesterday, and had a key error. 

 

War Eagle played some great D in the outfield laying out to for 3 run saving catches this weekend I saw at least, their closer had a great fastball and changeup, Sonny D had two huge homeruns.

 

Tip the hat to War Eagle, they earned that Omaha berth.

Edited June 14, 2022 by DazeNconfused

[ICamel]

Beaver baseball fans have got to be on par with the most delusional spectator's in college sports.

 

I went to a game at Goss Stadium a couple years ago and had a seat near third base. There was a fool nearby that was critiquing the plate umpire over called balls and strikes.