Yikes. "Nice Has No Future" True?

[Charles Fischer]

My FishDuck Friends....I enjoy this comic strip below, and both chuckled and winced when I read the punch-line.  How about you? Is that the future of public discourse?

 

 

This is a very pertinent point for yours-truly, because I've had to send emails to people recently where their snarky, sarcastic or condescending post was not bad violation, but in fact was mild.   They would admonish me for being anal, or "why kill some good fun?"

 

It is because I've learned the hard way that leaving even something mild up will either start an argument when someone responds back, or it lowers the bar and more people see it and do it themselves--which creates more work for me. (And begins to alter the forum atmosphere)  Besides...we don't do that stuff here.  I ask them..."was your post polite and respectful?"  (No!)

 

I was concluding with..."can't we just be nice to each other?"

 

For some people, that is hard; I predict that one of them won't be able to contain himself, and after multiple infractions will have to be banned.  I don't want to be too soft, and allow them to create more work for me, but most important....I just want nice people here.

 

So when I see the comic strip with the conclusion of, "Nice has no future,".....I say, "it does at the OBD forum!"

 

I love this community...

 

[NJDuck]

Thanks Charles for all you've done for the Duck community!

 

It's like weeds in a garden (snarky, sarcastic and condescending posts)  If you allow one to stay, it multiplies.  Stick to your guns Charles, keep the garden clear of weeds.  Gardens flourish and grow when properly kept.  So has this forum!

 

Besides all the wonderful informative articles, the new FishDuck Feed and posts going on here at the OBD forum, the 'Green Refuge' is what drew me to this forum in the first place.  So yes, all the news and the best intelligent discussions you ever want with the right touch of politeness and respectfulness towards one another! 

 

Love my Ducks and this OBD Forum!

 

 

[Charles Fischer]

On 8/31/2022 at 3:20 PM, NJDuck said:

 Stick to your guns Charles, keep the garden clear of weeds.

That is a perfect analogy, as weeds are small and appear harmless at first....like the mild violations.  But leave either of them alone and it changes the garden.  I gotta remember that example, as it is on-point.

[Log Haulin]

OBDF: Restoring Civility One Post at a Time.

[olcodgerduck]

Thanks @Charles Fischer for keeping this site family friendly and free from a lot of crap found on other sites.  A few minutes ago I was reading through the comments on this article (posted on the forum today, outsourced, not our material): 

 

Georgia football: 3 reasons Oregon could shock the Bulldogs

WWW.SATURDAYDOWNSOUTH.COM

---

It's not LIKELY, mind you, but we're here to tell you that it wouldn't be an earth-shaking upset.

 

 

It was not too horrible as forums go, but the anatomical correctness displayed was an eye opener.  I am so happy to have a forum to come to where decency and manners matter.

 

Thanks Charles!

 

Go Ducks!!

[DrJacksPlaidPants]

Please do not relent from your standards. I was talking about this site to my wife the other day about how it should be used as the standard for community social media pages.
 

Our neighborhood/community has its own Facebook page and sometimes I read the comments on my wife’s IPad. The site is a total disaster. It’s a great example of why I gave up Facebook long ago. However, sometimes I have to witness the train wreck to catch up on who I need to avoid when I’m out and about.

 

It usually starts out with an innocent post from somebody asking for help or advice about something mundane like best landscape company, electrician, general contractor, etc. This is typically followed up by the smart aleck who berates them for not using the search function. Then, a couple people will suggest their favorite companies which is followed up by people attacking said companies for unethical practices which leads to a side battle with personal attacks.

 

If that isn’t enough, the community “know it all” has to chime in and tell the person that the project that they’re requesting the workers for violates the covenants. This is typically followed up with the section(s) of the covenants being copied and pasted directly into a Facebook post. Usually, 5+ pages worth. This is typically followed up with several arguments about the spirit or intent of the covenants. 
 

Throw in several complaints about everything from speeders to slow moving golf carts to “too many deer” and you’ve got yourself and day’s worth of drama. I won’t even get into the never ending episodes of “Days of Our Volunteer Lake Patrol” that always play out on the page. I don’t know what’s worse. The idiots who can’t follow simple boating etiquette or the Lake Patrol’s Gestapo tactics. 
 

If this was painful for you to read then I hope it provides the motivation to keep the “undesirables” off this site. 

Edited September 1, 2022 by DrJacksPlaidPants

[Charles Fischer]

On 8/31/2022 at 5:51 PM, olcodgerduck said:

I was reading through the comments on this article

Good example.  We are adults and could have dealt with the second comment there, but why should we even have to see it?

 

BTW....the fellow who posts there in the comments as "dixieduck" is someone you used to read here often before being banned.  I knew JJ would reappear somewhere, and it is too bad he could not control himself here, because in the end--we all lose.  Oh well.  It was not until the fifth time being banned that I made it permanent.  (That is a bit soft)

[olcodgerduck]

I had wondered where he went...

[Washington Waddler]

     Charles, Groucho Marx had some good advice for what you have to deal with — “If the garbage man calls, tell him we don’t want any.”    

[Drake]

Seems to me that many of the people that feel the need to attack, or make fun of others, are generally insecure. Discussing a subject with them turns into a debate, which then escalates into an argument. 
 

Life is way too short to deal with the headaches.
 

 

Edited September 1, 2022 by Drake

[Charles Fischer]

On 8/31/2022 at 6:19 PM, DrJacksPlaidPants said:

If that isn’t enough, the community “know it all” has to chime in

Boy...your post is perfect in describing how if people are not kept in the "polite" lane, then they will veer in all kinds of directions that makes the site no longer fun to read or learn from.

 

And I forgot about it, but your post reminded me of the "Bully-of-the-Board," as there is always a few of those at every forum or site.  They try to take control and funnel all comments in the direction that he/she wants, and that is done by denigration, mocking, shaming and what I call, "Throwing Group-Shade." 

 

We had a few of those at FishDuck when I began the rules five years ago, and it took me a few years to figure out how to keep things on a pleasant path.  Most of those who leave are not banned, they leave on their own because they know I will no longer allow them to bully others.

 

A simple goal of "I want to see all opinions on all topics," is easy when everyone is nice to each other.  The hard part is convincing new members to tone down the aggression, and just share her/his opinion.  Again, the good news is that all of that is done privately by email, thus you don't have to witness the occasional distasteful exchanges. (And I am not going to blame all of those on the other parties, since I've admitted recently that am not noble!)  

[GatOrlando]

As a new poster I read the rules and appreciate the environment here. I may be a Gator fan but I enjoy all college football. This weekend I get some great games. Also I was one of those who may have added to the salt and I do apologize for that publicly. You have a great site here Charles. Thank you to all the Duck fans who have welcomed me here. Civility is alive after all.