Another delightfully funny article by Alan Lohner! Our pregame entertainment.  Snakes and scorpions-oh my!

 

Let's Give Arizona Back to its Original Owners

FISHDUCK.COM

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Football belongs in the Arizona Territory like beach volleyball belongs in North Dakota. Wipe away that put-on scowl. You know I'm right. And...

I was forced by security to walk in front of the student section and got chew spit dumped on me. Fortunately the Leo’s saw the little twat grabbed him. He resisted and blew his knee out in the process. The cops asked if I wanted to press charges. “No”, but can I say something to him. I said. Every rep in rehab say Quack Quack. 
 

....and Ducks use Horses and mules too!  Lol

 

 

On 10/8/2022 at 6:15 AM, Vandownbytheriverduck said:

I was forced by security to walk in front of the student section and got chew spit dumped on me. Fortunately the Leo’s saw the little twat grabbed him. He resisted and blew his knee out in the process. The cops asked if I wanted to press charges. “No”, but can I say something to him. I said. Every rep in rehab say Quack Quack. 
 

....and Ducks use Horses and mules too!  Lol

 

 

I will see your four and raise you 596 more

Another incredible Spoof by Alan...whew!  There are so many jokes, so many swipes at the Wildcats that I suggest reading more than once!

Alan brings fun to the sport and helps us to see it in a proper light.  These are a hoot to read.  Thanks for posting this Charles.

Great article, and writing. I have a feeling this one might sum up todays experience for the Arizona fans.

I hope Haywarduck is right with this one.  Az does sport the Conference's best DB and he's back from injury finally.  And we all know how Nix can sometimes make a bad throw... I hope he continues with the running portion of his contribution to yardage.

Edited October 8, 20222 yr by Mic

Alan, another funny spoof!  I've trained myself not to sip coffee while reading.  Thanks for all the good humor!

 

Your reference to "bear down" gives new meaning:

"But here’s the worst part: while the medics are wheeling the nearly decapitated Golden Bears player off the field, two hoodlums rush out of the stands, and with paint and brush, they scribble onto the turf those two unforgivably offensive words: “BEAR DOWN.”

Do native Americans actually want that place back?

Surely there are more luxurious climes available?

 

In my humble opinion, the only territorial/border change Arizona needs to make is to extend the border down south about 70 miles to the Gulf of California. 

 

Arizona would really appreciate some ocean front property. 

On 10/8/2022 at 6:37 AM, Log Haulin said:

I will see your four and raise you 596 more

But how are you getting the other 596 deep into the wilderness? 🤔 

But that is sexy! She looks Clean too. You two been together long? 🤦🏻‍♂️
 

Got a video with sound? Let’s hear her. 
 

My girl is old rough and pushy. 17a

 

On 10/9/2022 at 7:46 AM, Vandownbytheriverduck said:

But how are you getting the other 596 deep into the wilderness? 🤔 

But that is sexy! She looks Clean too. You two been together long? 🤦🏻‍♂️
 

Got a video with sound? Let’s hear her. 
 

My girl is old rough and pushy. 17a

 

IMG_9439.MOV

All my videos are too long

On 10/9/2022 at 7:46 AM, Vandownbytheriverduck said:

But how are you getting the other 596 deep into the wilderness? 🤔 

But that is sexy! She looks Clean too. You two been together long? 🤦🏻‍♂️
 

Got a video with sound? Let’s hear her. 
 

My girl is old rough and pushy. 17a

 

IMG_9439.MOV