Huskies: 'Only Because of Phil Knight and NIL'

[Charles Fischer]

I suppose every fan base blames NIL for when they lose a recruit, and obviously--they don't know that Oregon is not paying top-NIL dollar.  But they have their argument groomed from years of, "if it were not for Phil Knight," without looking at the great hires at Oregon, and the horrendous hires at Washington.  I am not being noble, (and I never claimed to be) but I can't get enough of this!

 

Crazy Quotes:

 

Assistant Coaches
 

"What is their OC going to be like? Adrian Klemm? Demetrice Martin? You're recycling coaches who are great recruiters, but there's a reason they haven't lasted long at the places they have been."

 

"Someone has their Green and gold Goggles on. Oregon has some very shaky assistant coaches."

 

"Lanning has raised questions with his ability to build a staff and we already dealt with that learning curve with Lake. Every coach at Oregon gets praised as a recruiter using Phil’s money for pay for play and facilities plus Nike influence, but this is a questionable Oregon staff in terms of proven coaches."

 

"Old saying about assistant coaches, “if you don’t know much, you can’t teach much “. Not sure the UO assistants know much."

 

 

Oregon Wins on Money Alone

"It’s a mercenary environment more than it is a team." 

 

"Makes me wonder if their mercenary style of recruiting will back fire after a mediocre season. How many of those players will jump ship at the first sign of trouble for greener $$$ pastures?"

 

"The perception here is that Duck fans have no problem with the program being one of the few in the country endowed with enough money to basically buy a top tier football team (thanks to Uncle Phil) - they don't care as long as the team wins. Does that perception feel accurate to you, or is there any debate within Duck Nation about the ethics involved when you can afford far more NIL $$$ than most of your competitors?"

 

"I for one thinks it’s gonna be pretty cool from here on out when we beat Oregon or USC. All of our local bigtime talent coming back to Husky stadium wearing the green and yellow only to be taken down by the home team that was looked past by the mighty Duck machine. We will hang our hats on our superior education and quality of young men. Hold up our nose at the immoral practices of the pay to play schools. Trading championships for ethics."

 

 

About Oregon's Team

 

"Their D-line could be in trouble." "This program can win eight games a year on talent alone, but can they beat USC or Utah or even Stanford?"

 

Response to Oregon Fan: "Your LBs will be your only strength on “D”. Because your DL will not get pressure (w/o T) your secondary will be exposed . Sorry, Ducks will be lucky to get 7 wins. Think about the last time OR tried to promote an assistant coach (MH) to HC- didn’t the Dawgs hang 70 on him before you fired him?"

 

"Impacted? They will win 8-9 games a season on talent alone and if get coached up watch out. Hate to admit that but it's true I believe."

[David Marsh]

It is clear they haven't kept up with their Duck news.

 

Granted, I tend to only read the Husky news that comes with the biggest side of tears. 

[NJDuck]

Wow.  I guess for husky fans as the old saying goes, Ignorant is Bliss?

[Haywarduck]

There are those who look for excuses and those who look for solutions. That is the big difference between the two programs. I don't enjoy being around people like that, and it makes total sense.

[Duck 1972]

These buttsniffers will never change. They are stuck in a time warp. Here's a penny, call someone who cares.

[David Marsh]

On 6/26/2022 at 1:39 PM, Haywarduck said:

There are those who look for excuses and those who look for solutions. That is the big difference between the two programs. I don't enjoy being around people like that, and it makes total sense.

I would say there is a real sense of looking to find solutions within the Oregon fan base over the Washington fan base as well... granted I think that mostly stems from the FishDuck community as other forums are pretty toxic in general. At least here we offer solutions... though I'm not sure how often we are listened to.

[Drake]

The puppies can lay claim to having the second best football team in the state of Washington. That has to count for something. 

[The Kamikaze Kid]

On 6/26/2022 at 4:14 PM, Drake said:

The puppies can lay claim to having the second best football team in the state of Washington. That has to count for something. 

I'm pretty sure Eastern Washington would take Montana so maybe 3rd place in the state is a better spot for the fuskies.

[1Ducker1]

Says the team that lost to Montana. 

[olcodgerduck]

On 6/26/2022 at 4:14 PM, Drake said:

The puppies can lay claim to having the second best College football team in the state of Washington. That has to count for something. 

There, I fixed it for you - there's some good high school teams in the state that might also give them a run for their money... LOL!!

[Guest Axel]

The surgeon general is faced with a hopeless dilemma—what to do with the hundreds of thousands of mentally ill Husky fans. Their level of derangement and dementedness has increased dangerously throughout the 21^st century, since its root cause is the overwhelming superiority of the Oregon Ducks.

 

The ever-ascending Ducks football program, which most pundits predict will continue for hundreds of years, has brought about raging paranoia, histrionic fury, and terminal bitterness among Husky fans. This is mental illness on an unprecedented scale.

 

We believe that it would be prudent to post warning signs on the highways and byways outside Seattle, so drivers can prepare themselves for the unsettling interactions sure to follow. We are not alarmists, so we have no problem with something low-key, like “BEWARE! Insane, psychotic people over the next hill.”

 

We have other reasonable suggestions, like flooding Seattle’s water supply with massive quantities of Xanax and banning the English alphabet in Washington, since reading and writing only exacerbate Husky berserk behaviors. Don’t believe me? Read the posts that Sir Charles has gleaned off those completely unhinged Husky message boards.

 

One lunatic predicts that the Ducks will win seven games this year. To come up with such an idiotic comment requires not only Husky delusion but also a requisite amount of glue-sniffing, The dimwitted Huskies who cast aspersions on Lanning’s excellent staff must similarly be huffing paint by the truckload.

 

Perhaps the most asinine Husky complaints of all are their heinous and unfounded accusations of Ducks pay-for-play.

 

The Washington Huskies are the college-football poster-children for cheating. Don James, “the Huskies' winningest coach,” is more aptly described as “the Huskies’ grungiest coach.” Outlaw Jesse James had more integrity. He was upfront about his thievery--he used a gun. By contrast, it took years for the truth to come out about Don James’ sleazy banditry.

 

The undisputed king of pay-for-play in college football is a former Husky halfback named Hugh McElhenny who took illegal payments for every game he ever played for Washington—in 1949, 1950, and 1951. Of course, the Huskies still celebrate McElhenny’s deceitful exploits. Bonkers? Yes. Depraved? Certainly. Mentally diseased? Massively.

 

James’ tainted teams are credited with 16 wins against Our Beloved Ducks. How many of those wins should be vacated? We’ll never know for sure, because of Husky perfidy and debauchery. The scuzzy Huskies buried the proverbial bodies and burned the evidence. Two things are clear, however:

 

First, the Huskies’ all-time record against the Ducks is dishonestly inflated. Second, the 1991 James-coached Husky team is not a national title winner—it’s a gang of cheats.

 

We assume that somewhere within that dank, creepy, dungeon in Montlake, there is a trophy case filled with rowing trophies that no one cares about. And displayed in that case is an even more worthless trophy that says “Huskies--1991 national champions.” You could replace that phony hardware with a “Dukes of Hazzard” lunch box and it would have equal significance.

 

Hypocrisy, duplicity, and out-and-out fraud are the standards at the University of Washington. You can be sure that the same nefarious and wanton activity will continue. The Husky athletic department is legendary for hiring individuals with the brains of Alvin the Chipmunk, the temperament of Mike Tyson, and the sportsmanship of Lance Armstrong.

 

Meanwhile, the crazies on the Husky forums continue to cry and whine about the Ducks, making about as much sense as a Mario Cristobal postgame press conference.

 

You’ve seen those brainless knobs on YouTube who can’t tell Australia from North Korea. They are Husky fans. The Flat-Earthers? Husky fans. Who are the nitwits who blow off their fingers every Fourth of July? They are Husky fans.

 

If any part of this post has made you laugh, I deeply apologize. Mental illness is no laughing matter. Well, on second thought, mental illness is a laughing matter when we’re talking about those crazed, totally off-the-wall, maniacal Husky fans.

 

If asked about his plans to cure Husky mental illness, I think the surgeon general would even say, “Laughter is the best medicine.”