Charles Fischer Administrator No. 1 Share Posted February 7, 2022 Over the last two months...we have lost some great members who used to post extensively, and now have decided to leave us. (I did not ban them!) Why did they leave? Here is one example... Get over it! One fellow wrote that, and I understand that it is fairly benign, but does it follow the culture of this forum? Is it "polite and respectful?" It is not, and after I sent an email pointing out the violation, and how I deleted the post--his answer back was.... "Delete my account." I explained that while mild, if you said that to my face, I would not hit you, but I would not like it, as it is rude. Now keep in mind--in the email I specifically state, "I am not banning you, or even warning you. I am simply notifying you, and asking you to please be more conscious of the rules." That is it! Another example of someone who has done wonderful analysis at times, and you would recognize the posting name immediately and you would be very disappointed that he is gone. He wrote: "....(what another member wrote)....is just silly." I edited it to, "...is not something I agree with" That is it! The rest of his long post was superb as usual, and I told him in the email that what the other fellow wrote was stupid-as-hell, but we cannot write a judgement about someone's opinion. Nobody would like to be told that their erudite opinion is silly, and I know I would not. What distinguishes this forum from others is the use of impulse control by the members, as that is hard sometimes. We are "the forum with decorum," but some people want me to make an exception for them. Problem is, we had seven of those mild violations over two months; leave them up and the bar has been lowered, and the culture of the site is changed. I've learned over the last four years that, "whatever you allow--you will see again. Soon." Effectively each of the great members who left was telling me..."Remove my post? I will punish you Charles." (By not being a part of this community?) Am I Deleting TOO MANY Posts? In January, I deleted 12 posts, which sounds like a lot, but it was out of a total of 4,332 posts written, thus it was only 3/10ths of 1% is all! I think that is a very low and very cool number, and it means we all want to follow the rules and have a harmonious forum. I am happy with that number, as it will never be perfect. What is the SOLUTION? There is no solution; I have to take the violating posts down, as I am not going to cut slack for the tiny percentage and muck-up the wonderful atmosphere we have at the Our Beloved Ducks forum. It is one of those bad-or-bad decisions to lose good people who get offended because they thought I was too harsh, or I begin the descent of what has been built here as friendly place to banter-with-your-Duck-Buddies. None of these seven people who have left have considered my position for a second; I am to allow their benign, but violating posts or they leave. Losing that many people makes me very sad, but I have no choice. When the rest of you get one of those emails from me? You are great sports about it, and we then forget about it and move on. (That is in my email that goes to everyone too) "I LOVE the Rules....Until They Apply to ME!" What I have described above has happened so many times over the last four years; one fellow insisted that, "sarcasm was simply humor, and a big part of his MO." I told him that his humor was at the expense of someone else and it is not "polite and respectful." He was a GREAT posting member who left... The point? I do not like it, but a reality with the forum has turned into a slogan, "As you enforce the rules, you will lose good people." I've known this for two years, but still miss these people and wish it did not happen. But I want you to know that I will not back down, and will remain consistent--regardless of those who leave on their own accord. I love this community, and what we have collectively built; with all I've sacrificed...I am not going to buckle now. We have something very special, and I am dedicated to preserving it. Mr. FishDuck 5 6 1 Mr. FishDuck Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
bzduck13 No. 2 Share Posted February 7, 2022 Charles, it is your site, and your forum. Run it the way you want. If people choose to leave because of a decision you make, that is their problem, not yours. I have been a reader of this site for a number of years and have thoroughly enjoyed the product, even if I don’t always agree. Keep up the good work. You don’t always make the right decision or choice, but then, neither do the rest of us. Continue to treat others with grace and kindness, even when disagreements arise. And keep providing good, discussable information and an opportunity to discuss enjoy OBD. 1 4 2 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
webfootfan No. 3 Share Posted February 7, 2022 I like a site that simply requires us to disagree with each other without attacking anyone. and yeah, attacking can be very lite but still be an attack. Well done, Charles. 1 3 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Flyin Vee No. 4 Share Posted February 7, 2022 (edited) I strongly object to that hideous header color at the top of the front page. Edited February 7, 2022 by Flyin Vee 4 2 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
WiseKwacker No. 5 Share Posted February 7, 2022 Charles, I don't know you personally, but I have a sense of you as a person by the way you run this forum. Sometimes I worry that you are a little too self-critical. The beauty of this forum is that it is a chance for me and others to hear from informed Duck fans--yourself included--in a troll-free environment. Sports is integrally connected to our emotions--at least for most of us--so it's understandable that we sometimes react to another fan's opinion with emotion. This is, after all, a place where passionate Duck fans congregate. If a fellow passionate Duck fan can't back off from a judgmental or demeaning comment when you give them a "tap on the shoulder," and even offer a more non-confrontational alternative phrase, he/she needs to go. It would be my hope that, after a brief "cooling off" period, that same person would contact you and ask to re-join this forum. Note that part of the reason I'm offering these insightful comments is to let others on OBD forum know that I'm not one of the people who are leaving. You know, all the members who eagerly await my typically pithy comments on all things Ducks... 2 3 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
DUCati855 Moderator No. 6 Share Posted February 7, 2022 Keep it up Charles. There are many other forums for them to word things to their "MO". I have tried a few other forums myself and I always end up back here. Thank you for providing and protecting this forum. 1 2 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Charles Fischer Author Administrator No. 7 Share Posted February 7, 2022 On 2/7/2022 at 2:25 PM, Flyin Vee said: I strongly object to that hideous header color at the top of the front page. There we go...a different color to get everyone's attention! Mr. FishDuck Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
David Marsh No. 8 Share Posted February 7, 2022 I've said it once and I will say it again.. it is nice to post somewhere that there aren't a series of replies that tell me that I am dumb for not holding the same opinion as others. There is a reason I don't post on other forums. Discussion is fun, if we didn't discuss things it would be boring. I can talk to myself just fine and I agree with me 99% of the time but I rarely gain new insight hearing the same opinion. Thanks Charles. 1 4 1 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
David Marsh No. 9 Share Posted February 7, 2022 On 2/7/2022 at 2:55 PM, Charles Fischer said: There we go...a different color to get everyone's attention! and I was seriously was about to say "at least it's not purple..." and you have gone and done it. 1 1 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
DUCati855 Moderator No. 10 Share Posted February 7, 2022 Purple!!! Please delete my account! JK'ing 1 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Charles Fischer Author Administrator No. 11 Share Posted February 7, 2022 On 2/7/2022 at 3:01 PM, DUCati855 said: Purple!!! Please delete my account! JK'ing No, that is Fuchsia! 1 Mr. FishDuck Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
1Ducker1 No. 12 Share Posted February 7, 2022 On 2/7/2022 at 3:03 PM, Charles Fischer said: No, that is Fuchsia! thats even worse,I thought I was having a 70s flashback. 1 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Charles Fischer Author Administrator No. 13 Share Posted February 7, 2022 Look at the bright side, when you consider Oregon has won 15 of the last 17....purple becomes such a benign color. Who cares? (But it is Fuchsia above) 2 Mr. FishDuck Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
30Duck Moderator No. 14 Share Posted February 7, 2022 A big difference here from other Forums is that at the other sites people have a thought post it, and that's it. Here, we are about discussion. We add our thoughts, but are interested in what others have to say, in all of the different topics. This works because we don't all have to think the same way about something. 1 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Charles Fischer Author Administrator No. 15 Share Posted February 7, 2022 Something I forgot in the original post--you see none of the discussions between the violators and I. It is done privately, so it is not a buzz-kill to a thread. But thank goodness for the moderators catching them so quickly... Without the Moderators... 1 Mr. FishDuck Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
1Ducker1 No. 16 Share Posted February 7, 2022 On 2/7/2022 at 3:26 PM, Charles Fischer said: Look at the bright side, when you consider Oregon has won 15 of the last 17....purple becomes such a benign color. Who cares? (But it is Fuchsia above) Come to think of it that would be a great color for the Huskies. 2 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
kirklandduck Moderator No. 17 Share Posted February 8, 2022 On 2/7/2022 at 2:55 PM, Charles Fischer said: There we go...a different color to get everyone's attention! I don't mind the color, I'm a T-Mobile subscriber 1 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
NJDuck Moderator No. 18 Share Posted February 8, 2022 (edited) Hi Charles, You are correct, you stand by your conviction. It's because of those convictions helped kept this site safe, insightful, engaging and successful! Love reading all the contributions everyone has presented to this site. Without those convictions this sight would not be what it is today. Thanks Charles Edited February 8, 2022 by NJDuck 1 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Duck1984 No. 19 Share Posted February 8, 2022 I am told that I am wrong often enough by family that it doesn’t bother me when people here say the same. But I appreciate how nicely it is said here compared to home! Sad that others that enjoy discussing our Ducks feel they’d rather be right than nice. Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
jrw Moderator No. 20 Share Posted February 8, 2022 Keep it up and keep it the way it is, Charles. You can tell from the page views that the policy is working. It's not hard to rephrase, "If you believe Mario is a great coach, you're delusional!" Just change it to, "I don't think Mario is a great coach for several reasons, such as...". It's not that hard, just requires a bit of...decorum. 2 2 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
PittDuck No. 21 Share Posted February 8, 2022 Keep up the good work Charles. This is the Forum with Decorum, and we all know that means to keep it civil. As a fan who has been reminded not to throw shade, I have no problem what so ever with the site being policed and un-civil comments being toned down. Any of us can politely disagree with anything posted, and that is not only OK, it is an expectation. I for one keep coming back to OBDF because it does offer opposing viewpoints in a non-judgmental fashion. If people want to belittle other people for their honest opinions, I would rather not read it and would rather they took it elsewhere. I don’t always agree with some points of view, but I do try to remember they are coming from somebody who loves their Ducks just as much as I love my Ducks! 2 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Charles Fischer Author Administrator No. 22 Share Posted February 8, 2022 On 2/7/2022 at 5:43 PM, PittDuck said: As a fan who has been reminded not to throw shade... Me too. None of us here wear halos, as I've made mistakes in posting like everyone else. Since it was read by too many others--I apologized in public and in private to the affected party. That is why with regulars--I do understand when we make a mistake--we acknowledge it and then move on and forget about it. I have to use significant impulse control like everyone else, and I am grateful that everyone has the strength and patience to do it. Seeing posts on other sites where they are "impolite" to each other makes me appreciate everyone here that much more. And thanks PittDuck. With what will be happening with Coach Lanning--I think this is going to be a very lively place to discuss OBD this fall! Mr. FishDuck Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
PittDuck No. 23 Share Posted February 8, 2022 On 2/7/2022 at 5:55 PM, Charles Fischer said: With what will be happening with Coach Lanning--I think this is going to be a very lively place to discuss OBD this fall! Pretty exciting time to be a Duck fan! Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
woundedknees No. 24 Share Posted February 8, 2022 If everyone went through life the way 'we' try to work together keeping this site a haven of civility, this world would be very boring... for the troublemakers. Kudos , Charles. 1 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Viking Duck No. 25 Share Posted February 10, 2022 On 2/7/2022 at 3:33 PM, Charles Fischer said: Something I forgot in the original post--you see none of the discussions between the violators and I. It is done privately, so it is not a buzz-kill to a thread. But thank goodness for the moderators catching them so quickly... Without the Moderators... BTW, that cat landed on some trash bags and ran off, perfectly fine. Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
BigDog No. 26 Share Posted February 10, 2022 In my humble opinion Charles you are simply asking people to treat others as they want to be treated. Most people can accomplish this through self control. However self control is quickly eroded by entitlement. Once entitlement takes root all bets are off. Everyone is susceptible to this, it's human nature. You can't change their mind, you can only stand for what is right and not conform under the pressure of their loss or anyone else's. I think it's safe to say that 99% of us are thankful for your efforts to provide a safe and enjoyable forum. It is here that we can focus on something positive instead of the nonsense around us. Thank you, be strong and courageous! 1 1 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
EastBayDuckDad Moderator No. 27 Share Posted February 10, 2022 Charles, I applaud you running the site as you wish. I for one am tired of the confrontation that some people indulge in when they know they are anonymous and can spew their vitriol online without having the guts to face up with someone they disagree with. Like many others that follow and post here, I am of a certain advanced age. I grew up with "social media" that involved telling someone in person what you thought. If you weren't willing to do that you kept things to yourself and shut the f*** up. Here, there is a standard of civility that makes me think I would be willing to have a beer with anyone I don't see eye to eye with. Thank you for the venue! 1 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Charles Fischer Author Administrator No. 28 Share Posted February 10, 2022 On 2/10/2022 at 1:04 AM, EastBayDuckDad said: Here, there is a standard of civility that makes me think I would be willing to have a beer with anyone I don't see eye to eye with. Thank you for your thoughts, and yes--I could really disagree with someone on a topic--but I bet if we had a beer together (from this community) we may not agree, but we would have some laughs and have a lot more in common than not as an Oregon fan. A really nice community here... Mr. FishDuck Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Duckology No. 29 Share Posted February 10, 2022 While I fully understand the rationale behind a sports forum with decorum rules, It is going to be a never ending battle with a potential user base of highly opinionated, passionate and yes sometimes even rabid fans... Football is a game of passion and raw emotion and that bleeds over into the fanbase. I think the rules that are currently in place will keep individuals from feeling trampled upon but at the cost of user base growth. While quality of over quantity is an admirable goal, it severely limits the revenue potential of the site. I can see this format working for an investment club forum, or a masters chess club site, but for collegiate football? It essentially turns tackle football into flag football. That may be the desired level of rhetoric for some but it is gong to severely limit the sites financial viability. If the goal of the site is to have a close knit forum of like minded fans who enjoy discussing everything Duck in a civilized manner then I say keep on keeping on. If the goal is to grow revenue then I would humbly suggest limiting the intervention by admins to the most severe examples of reprehensible discourse. Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Charles Fischer Author Administrator No. 30 Share Posted February 10, 2022 On 2/10/2022 at 9:22 AM, Duckology said: While I fully understand the rationale behind a sports forum with decorum rules, It is going to be a never ending battle with a potential user base of highly opinionated, passionate and yes sometimes even rabid fans... Football is a game of passion and raw emotion and that bleeds over into the fanbase. I think the rules that are currently in place will keep individuals from feeling trampled upon but at the cost of user base growth. While quality of over quantity is an admirable goal, it severely limits the revenue potential of the site. I can see this format working for an investment club forum, or a masters chess club site, but for collegiate football? It essentially turns tackle football into flag football. That may be the desired level of rhetoric for some but it is gong to severely limit the sites financial viability. If the goal of the site is to have a close knit forum of like minded fans who enjoy discussing everything Duck in a civilized manner then I say keep on keeping on. If the goal is to grow revenue then I would humbly suggest limiting the intervention by admins to the most severe examples of reprehensible discourse. You and I have had this discussion before, and I thank you for the way you presented it. It is an interesting discussion; can it grow enough with just the rational/reasonable fans? I have changed my thoughts since I spoke with you a while back, as now--I do not think it can ever reach a "critical-mass" needed to put up a paywall and create revenue. "Limiting the intervention" would end up discouraging a large percentage here from posting, and we would effectively become like all the other forums, and that is not my objective at the OBD forum at all. I have resigned myself to it being a smaller, but safe place to read and post. And it will remain free and stay up and available so long as I get enough volunteer help to assist me with some of the minor things that need to be done. BTW, Duckology....I am putting into place the suggestions you gave me concerning Web Development/coding, and I do appreciate your feedback. It was very kind of you, and am always available to chat. 1 Mr. FishDuck Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Charles Fischer Author Administrator No. 31 Share Posted February 22, 2022 I appreciate all the kind thoughts here! Mr. FishDuck Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Charles Fischer Author Administrator No. 32 Share Posted February 24, 2022 On 2/10/2022 at 1:04 AM, EastBayDuckDad said: Thank you for the venue! I hope to have it for a very long time... Mr. FishDuck Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...