The Pain of Being a Superfan

[FishDuck Article]

This last loss has hurt more than any other loss I can recall, and when I came to write this article I reflected on a video from It’s OK to be Smart entitled The Strange Psychology of Superfans. I highly suggest that everyone watches it, because it is telling in just what makes us tick. During the video they go ...

 

The Pain of Being a Superfan

FISHDUCK.COM

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This last loss has hurt more than any other loss I can recall, and when I came to write this article I reflected on a video from It's OK to be Smart...

[Annie]

Well, I guess while am I a super fan of the Ducks, I am not a Superfan. I love, love, love the Ducks and love watching them play. I am joyful for days after they win.

 

But when they lose, well, I'm sad for a short while, but then I start looking ahead, be it to the next game or the next season. I think of the real sadness I've dealt with, be it personal or out in the world, and losing a football game just doesn't compare for me.

 

That's not to say that I think there's anything amiss with someone really feeling down after a loss. We feel what we feel, and there's no right or wrong about that.

[jrw]

David Marsh, I know exactly what you are thinking and feeling; great piece of writing. I've had to learn over the years to force myself, against my natural inclinations, to not let my emotional life hinge on a bunch of strangers over whom I have no control. It's been difficult, but I've gotten to the point where I'm not for days replaying the devastating losses on a doom-loop. It may cut down on the highs, but it certainly minimizes the lows.

[DUCati855]

David, I to must be a Superfan. I went to bed Friday night with a knot in my stomach. I hoped I would wake up feeling better. I did not. I couldn't watch any games on Saturday and found myself moping around all weekend.

 

I had a business meeting Sunday evening with someone I knew was a Duck fan. He seemed fine. I asked his thoughts on the game. He cavalierly stated it sucks they lost. But, it wasn't going to affect his life.

 

I walked away from that meeting feeling jealous of his maturity... Then went back to moping. 

[bbmichaels]

Thanks David.

 

Fandom is an odd thing, isn't it? Why do we become so emotionally invested in something we're not directly involved with, at least not with the outcomes?

 

I was born and raised in Eugene, and am a UO alum. I have been watching the Ducks for basically my entire life, and I can remember a time when I felt much like you describe. But over the years, and now having kids myself, my perspective has changed. I find myself more in line with what Annie and jrw describe above. And while I enjoy watching them succeed, and am disappointed when they don't, I've gradually come to terms with the reality that I have no control over the outcome. Nor do I even know the coaches/players. And their successes and failures aren't truly my successes and failures.

 

Not to go all anti-fandom, but the Ducks winning really shouldn't give me any bragging rights, and the Ducks losing shouldn't give the fan of some other team the ability to make me feel bad. Why would they?

 

Long story short, my sense of self-worth isn't tied to how the Ducks play - it instead hangs on my own successes and failures, and the happiness and well-being of my kids. I'll always keep up with the Ducks, and enjoy when they're good, and be disappointed when they're not, but their outcomes in no way define me.

 

(Written more rationally than I sometimes feel - so maybe you should consider me a "recovering superfan.")

[Drake]

I feel your pain.

 

Playing sports, or being a sports fan is a total cathartic experience. It can be an emotional rollercoaster for both players and fans. 

 

Remember the Wide World of Sports? ….The thrill of victory and the agony of defeat…if you don’t, look it up on the internet. 
 

We all can create a list of bad things that happen to good people that would make a sports loss seem rather small in the scale of bad things that happen.
 

However, being a fan means I am fanatical, and at times, maybe somewhat unrealistic in my expectations.

 

I am at an age where I have experienced dramatic loss. I am also at the age that I am getting worried that I won’t live long enough to see my Ducks win the BIG ONE. 
 

 

[DanLduck]

Sports is an escape from the throes of life.

A chance to feel a part of something greater then ourselves. An opportunity to join in with like minded individuals sharing joy and enthusiasm. 

Something 'good' to cheer for.

 

And when our team is victorious, we vicariously share in that experience. 

And when they aren't, we'll, it can be very devastating. 

 

It doesn't even make sense, logically, to be so down, but being a sports fan doesn't allow for common sense.

 

Our real lives sometimes are so full of less than joyful moments, that is it too much to ask for a win?!

 

I am constantly battling with myself to keep an even keel when our Ducks lose, but I have to admit it's taken me 3 days to see the sun again.

 

I have suffered real loss in my life, and the Ducks losing isn't the same, I know.

But that doesn't take away the feeling of loss of the hopes for a championship. 

I'm in awe of those of you who have found a way to move on so easily.

 

So I encourage those of you, who like me, need a few extra days to regain balance, hang in there.

 

We still have a bowl game to watch.

And the portal to watch.

And early signing day.

And spring ball.

Another portal period.

Fall practice.

And before you know it, a new season, and in the B1G too.

Woo hoo. Sco Ducks!

 

[DrJacksPlaidPants]

I watched my favorite MLB team (Rangers) win their first ever World Series this year and it was awesome. Especially knocking off our arrogant, cheating rivals in the ALCS. I had started following them when I first moved to Dallas in the mid 80’s and they were pretty awful.
 

Like Oregon, they slowly got better. They eventually got to the point where they were one strike away from the 2011 WS championship only to have the rug pulled out from under them. It always feels good when you’ve watched them through the hard times and they finally reach the top of the mountain.

 

It was a great moment. I bought the shirt and hat and watched the parade on TV…and then it was over. I was on to other things. The elation of winning lasts no longer than the sorrow of losing. Life goes on. 
 

However, be glad that your team gave you a reason to be sad. If you’re only feeling is apathy when they lose then it’s very likely that they stink.

[Jon Joseph]

Thanks, David.

 

'Bowls, Polls, and Tattered Souls.' And nuclear fallout in Tallahassee. 

 

'Fan' is a most appropriate diminutive for 'Fanatic.'

 

That was a tough long weekend.

[Steven A]

Thanks for your take, David.

 

Since my grandkids are all older than your daughter, I probably have a shorter disappointment curve than you.  This is probably due to the fact that I have lived through more Duck disappointments.

 

Yes, there was so much hope for this team.  I chatted with Charles that I thought this might be the best all-around team ever fielded.  So, as you implied, not playing up to their potential sucked and hurt.

 

My funk is still lingering but wasn't as deep as in the past.  I did not watch any games Saturday either; I just checked my espn app periodically for scores.

 

After a Duck loss, I take solace when other people's teams screw-up and lose so that they can feel what I am feeling.

 

Now, I will be on edge until ewe dub loses.

 

I can't even bring myself to think they might not.

 

 

 

 

 

 

[Charles Fischer]

Boy do I hear you David.  We try to be mature, to be philosophical about it.

 

But damn...it hurts.

 

I do take solace in that I'm not as wacko as the people I ban each year who go crazy when Oregon loses...

 

But I'm close...

[Duckdude]

I’ve still got a Duck hangover!  They lost a game they shouldn’t have! And….that was a stepping stone to Bigger Things.  “Poof!”  Gone!

 

Damn right I’ve got the (Duck) Blues!

[1Ducker1]

Excellent article!! Very much the same with me, losses pretty much kill my week. As my son says to me "you're one crazy ducker"

[DuckUp1]

I felt the same thing David. I had bought tickets to the Michigan vs Oregon basketball game awhile back and took my kids Saturday.

 

That OT win kinda gave me a reset. If it wasn't for that, I would still be in the dumps.

 

 

 

[Haywarduck]

I have worked at a lot things in my time going around the sun, over and over and over, and failure is just part of the process. The one thing I have learned is when the despair is the greatest, and your ready to give up, you are actually very close to success.

 

I take your great despair as an indication we are close. For that I am grateful, and that is the other thing I have found, always be grateful.

 

I mean what a season, and so many amazing moments to remember. 

 

We also must remember, don't ever give up when despair is the greatest, as the goal is actually within sight!

[Jon Joseph]

Some of the pain should disappear when Oregon joins the B1G and gets B1G respect whether the B1G has earned respect on the field or not.

 

Exhibit I.

 

School A. - 13-0 B. - 13-0

 

A. 5 Top 25 wins. B - 3.

 

A. 6 FPI Top 35 wins. B. - 3.

 

SOR - A.- 1. B - 2.

 

SOS - A. 11. B. 33.

 

The FSU pass game seemed to matter greatly to the Committee.

 

Passing Yards Per Game - A. 344 B. 219.

 

Which team should be the higher ranked and playing in the Rose Bowl and not in Dixie?  

 

A. Washington or B. Michigan?

 

Exhibit II. 

 

School A. 10-2. School B. 10-2

 

A. 5 FPI Quad 1 wins. B. 1 Quad 1 win.

 

A. Best win - No. 3. Texas - Neutral site. B. Best win - No. 17. Iowa. Home win.

 

Which team should play in an NY6 Bowl, A. Oklahoma, or B. Penn State.

 

Sometimes it's the Eye Test, other times it's Metrics. The Committee makes it up as it goes along to support its rankings.

 

Example: No. 21 8-4 Tennessee lost to Florida. Unranked 8-4 Utah defeated Florida and lost 4 games to 2. UW, 8. Oregon, 14. Arizona, and 19. Oregon State. 3 on the road. 

 

The entire process would be improved by the Committee not having interim rankings so ESPN can make more money. With 1 final ranking, Bama does not jump from 8 to 4, UGA from 1 to 6, and FSU from 4 to out-of-the-playoff.

 

At least next season the whining will be coming from teams 11, 12, and 13.

 

This season if CFB had a 12-team PO and not a 4-team Invitational, FSU would be playing Liberty in Tallahassee and Oregon would be playing Missouri in Eugene. 

 

Edited December 6, 2023 by Jon Joseph

[Pete]

I hate it. I know I'm not the only one here who thought the Ducks were gonna run away with it at after we took that lead 24-21, but alas fate had other plans. As a lifelong Virginia fan (turned Oregon fan later in life when I attended UO for grad school and married a Duck), I am reminded of what Virginia basketball coach Tony Bennett's said after becoming the first 1 seed ever to lose to a 16 seed in 2018. He told the team, "Weeping may endure for the night, but joy comes in the morning." (A biblical quote -- I am not a religious person, but it rings true for me.) Bennett said, "We will have some tough nights, because you're so close you could taste it, but absolutely joy will come in the morning for what these guys have established... This is life – it can't define you. You enjoy the good times, and you gotta be able to take the bad times. That can't, in the end, define these guys and our team."

 

The next year Virginia got redemption by winning the school's first natty. So hang in the there Duck superfans. We've had some tough nights this week because we were so close. But Lanning will channel the pain and make this team better... and joy will come in the morning. 

Edited December 6, 2023 by Pete

[Duckster]

Hey David, kudos to you for a wonderful piece of writing. Interesting that despite age, life experience, personality, etc., we all process in different ways. Always nice to know that there are others who take these losses (admittedly) harder than they should, and that the "recovery" time for each of us varies. 

 

I can now say that I've spent centuries watching the Ducks. My freshman year, Air Force, with Norval Turnover as our QB (yes that Norv Turner for those who follow this stuff). I also came west from Virginia, full of ignorance and old allegiances, really not knowing what I was getting myself into. Oregon would stink for the next 15 years. It was a litany of bad coaches (we can debate the yin-yang of Rich Brooks another time), terrible facilities and a small very apathetic fanbase (who could blame us/them)? You guys remember the "Bottom Ten"? ... we lived there.

 

Somehow, despite all of that trauma I became an eternal fan. It's really not something I can help now, it just is  Just as my bitterness after a loss like last week will linger for some time to come. Hell, I'm still bitter about Stanford (my near neighbor) repeatedly stealing our lunch some years back and depriving us of conference championships and Rose Bowls. 

 

I no longer beat myself up for responding the way I do, or allowing that reaction to define my personal definition (or level) of maturity. Again, at this point in my life, it is what it is. I now have my coping mechanisms firmly in place and can compartmentalize with the best of them. So it's much easier for me at this stage of life to set all things Duck aside for awhile and let time and life wash the wound clean. And there it will remain ... managed but never forgotten.